An Unexpected Journey
Yes, I stole my title from The Hobbit. Part of that is because I saw this movie yesterday, and I loved it. I had never read the book, so I had no expectations going into it, but I sure came back with a lot out of it.
As I began to watch this movie, I felt like I could relate so much to Mr. Bilbo Baggins. I feel as if I have been through his journey. You see, Bilbo is just an ordinary Hobbit, living in the Shire, comfortable in his home. He likes it there. He reads and gardens and does comfortable things. Then, one day Gandalf comes and Bilbo's world is never the same. Gandalf asks Bilbo to go on an adventure. Bilbo says no. Gandalf leaves and makes plans for Bilbo to go on this adventure anyways, unbeknownst to Bilbo. Then the next day (or later that evening, I can't remember) these dwarves begin to show up at Bilbo's home, as well as Gandalf. Bilbo finds out that Gandalf has invited them and finds out about the adventure they want him to go on. At first he says no. No way. I can't do it. Then, the next morning he wakes up and everyone is gone and the contract is still laying there. In a split second decision, he signs the contract and goes running after Gandalf and the dwarves. They go through an adventure of many near death events, where Bilbo surprises everyone, including himself with his bravery. There is my summary of what I saw, although unfortunately this is only part one so I don't know the ending.
I felt that maybe this would be good a time to elaborate why I feel so much like Bilbo Baggins and also, bring out a few more detailed parts that stood out to me. I might never have exactly explained how I ended up in Honduras. In order to do this, let me start way back in 5th grade, ironically the very same grade I am teaching. I went on my first mission trip when I was in 5th grade. I was 11 years old and I went to Cuba. This was my first experience, and it definitely started a desire to serve God in another country, however, I consider it just one of the many reasons I started to care about this. That summer I went to camp. I remember very distinctly talking with my counselor at a campfire and telling her that I thought maybe I might be called to be a missionary someday. A few weeks later I was back home from camp, and I was terrified. I didn't think this could possibly be right. I was getting the mail for my parents one day and I found a letter for my parents from camp and I knew right away what it was. I knew it was a letter telling my parents that I had said I might be called to be a missionary. And here's what I did, (to this day I don't think my parents even know this) I opened it and I ripped it to pieces throwing it into the trash can at the post office, too scared to face the possibility. I thought that I could rip up God's plans, but it turns out I can't.
Fast forward a few years later to college. I am sitting at Indiana Wesleyan during mission's week my freshman year (and every year for the next 3) feeling as if I should be responding to this, but unsure how this could possibly line up with teaching. Then God came knocking at my door proposing a grand adventure. There were several things said during this point in the movie from Gandalf that I wanted to bring out.
1. He tells Bilbo "What happened to the young hobbit I once knew?" This 5th grade me who once longed for this. God asked me, what happened to her? She longed for adventure. My answer: she got scared and comfortable.
2. I, like Bilbo, struggled much with fear, yet secretly longed for adventure. When all the dwarves looked at him they didn't see much, in fact Bilbo himself didn't think that he had what it took to go on the adventure. To which Gandalf said, "There is a lot more in him than you guess, and a deal more than he has any idea of himself." I believe that at that time in my life, and even now God is still saying this to me.
3. Gandalf tells Bilbo, "The world is not in your maps and books. It's out there. " He also tells him, "You'll have a tale or two to tell when you come back." To which Bilbo responds, "Can you promise that I will come back?" "No, and if you do you will not be the same."
Wow. This is what I feel like God has told me. Yes he is taking care of me, but there aren't guarantees and mostly, the guarantee is that I will never be the same. And I won't. After this adventure I won't ever be the same again.
4. Then another quote that stood out to me came from Bilbo himself after he had separated from the group and they had thought that he had come home:
" I know you doubt me - I know you always have. You're right, I often think of Bag End. I miss my books and my armchair and my garden. See that's where I belong. That's home. That's why I came back. You don't have one - a home. It was taken from you. But I will help you take it back if I can."
In this I think of my students. I have grown up with many opportunities before me. I have also grown up with the great gift of Jesus in my life. That's why I'm here. That's why I came back after last year. That they can also have a chance to have that.
Now here's the interesting thing. I have been thinking and pleading with God to show me whether I am to stay here for another year or to go back home. unfortunately, I have not received any answers right now. But I do know this. One of the wonderful yet annoying things about the movie I saw yesterday is that the journey, the adventure wasn't over. I don't know where they will go next in the movie or what will happen. I don't know that about my life right now either. The only assurance I have is that whether I go home or I stay, God says that my adventure isn't over yet. I am a part of his grand adventure and I will be, until the day I die. This journey was unexpected... and now you know a little of how I got here as a fearful little girl, somehow made brave enough in Christ to leave her home, which even if she returns to it, will never be the same.
As I began to watch this movie, I felt like I could relate so much to Mr. Bilbo Baggins. I feel as if I have been through his journey. You see, Bilbo is just an ordinary Hobbit, living in the Shire, comfortable in his home. He likes it there. He reads and gardens and does comfortable things. Then, one day Gandalf comes and Bilbo's world is never the same. Gandalf asks Bilbo to go on an adventure. Bilbo says no. Gandalf leaves and makes plans for Bilbo to go on this adventure anyways, unbeknownst to Bilbo. Then the next day (or later that evening, I can't remember) these dwarves begin to show up at Bilbo's home, as well as Gandalf. Bilbo finds out that Gandalf has invited them and finds out about the adventure they want him to go on. At first he says no. No way. I can't do it. Then, the next morning he wakes up and everyone is gone and the contract is still laying there. In a split second decision, he signs the contract and goes running after Gandalf and the dwarves. They go through an adventure of many near death events, where Bilbo surprises everyone, including himself with his bravery. There is my summary of what I saw, although unfortunately this is only part one so I don't know the ending.
I felt that maybe this would be good a time to elaborate why I feel so much like Bilbo Baggins and also, bring out a few more detailed parts that stood out to me. I might never have exactly explained how I ended up in Honduras. In order to do this, let me start way back in 5th grade, ironically the very same grade I am teaching. I went on my first mission trip when I was in 5th grade. I was 11 years old and I went to Cuba. This was my first experience, and it definitely started a desire to serve God in another country, however, I consider it just one of the many reasons I started to care about this. That summer I went to camp. I remember very distinctly talking with my counselor at a campfire and telling her that I thought maybe I might be called to be a missionary someday. A few weeks later I was back home from camp, and I was terrified. I didn't think this could possibly be right. I was getting the mail for my parents one day and I found a letter for my parents from camp and I knew right away what it was. I knew it was a letter telling my parents that I had said I might be called to be a missionary. And here's what I did, (to this day I don't think my parents even know this) I opened it and I ripped it to pieces throwing it into the trash can at the post office, too scared to face the possibility. I thought that I could rip up God's plans, but it turns out I can't.
Fast forward a few years later to college. I am sitting at Indiana Wesleyan during mission's week my freshman year (and every year for the next 3) feeling as if I should be responding to this, but unsure how this could possibly line up with teaching. Then God came knocking at my door proposing a grand adventure. There were several things said during this point in the movie from Gandalf that I wanted to bring out.
1. He tells Bilbo "What happened to the young hobbit I once knew?" This 5th grade me who once longed for this. God asked me, what happened to her? She longed for adventure. My answer: she got scared and comfortable.
2. I, like Bilbo, struggled much with fear, yet secretly longed for adventure. When all the dwarves looked at him they didn't see much, in fact Bilbo himself didn't think that he had what it took to go on the adventure. To which Gandalf said, "There is a lot more in him than you guess, and a deal more than he has any idea of himself." I believe that at that time in my life, and even now God is still saying this to me.
3. Gandalf tells Bilbo, "The world is not in your maps and books. It's out there. " He also tells him, "You'll have a tale or two to tell when you come back." To which Bilbo responds, "Can you promise that I will come back?" "No, and if you do you will not be the same."
Wow. This is what I feel like God has told me. Yes he is taking care of me, but there aren't guarantees and mostly, the guarantee is that I will never be the same. And I won't. After this adventure I won't ever be the same again.
4. Then another quote that stood out to me came from Bilbo himself after he had separated from the group and they had thought that he had come home:
" I know you doubt me - I know you always have. You're right, I often think of Bag End. I miss my books and my armchair and my garden. See that's where I belong. That's home. That's why I came back. You don't have one - a home. It was taken from you. But I will help you take it back if I can."
In this I think of my students. I have grown up with many opportunities before me. I have also grown up with the great gift of Jesus in my life. That's why I'm here. That's why I came back after last year. That they can also have a chance to have that.
Now here's the interesting thing. I have been thinking and pleading with God to show me whether I am to stay here for another year or to go back home. unfortunately, I have not received any answers right now. But I do know this. One of the wonderful yet annoying things about the movie I saw yesterday is that the journey, the adventure wasn't over. I don't know where they will go next in the movie or what will happen. I don't know that about my life right now either. The only assurance I have is that whether I go home or I stay, God says that my adventure isn't over yet. I am a part of his grand adventure and I will be, until the day I die. This journey was unexpected... and now you know a little of how I got here as a fearful little girl, somehow made brave enough in Christ to leave her home, which even if she returns to it, will never be the same.
well put! thanks for sharing that jennifer! makes me want to see the movie. AND makes me thankful- of how God is working to change us into something more and isn't willing to let us settle for "safe" with a whole world out there who need Him.
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